That's Nick Clegg's Fault.

So I thought perhaps if I listed some of my better (photography) posts, pictures and themes and stuff, and then you can have a look, and then um, if you like them maybe you could have a think about nominating me and maybe voting for me and being nice to me and then maybe I might win even though I obviously would be really pleased if the others won but somehow I want to win and beat them all.

Please.

Uh...

Thanks.

Happy Birthday, Isaac - A post featuring pics from Isaac's first birthday and a video of photography from his first year

Oh. Hello Stranger - In which two of my worlds collide spectacularly.

There Are No Subliminal Messages - Um, there are no subliminal messages.

Then there are posts with the usual holiday snaps from my favourite place in the South of England.

Like to see collections? Check out anything about The Gallery, hosted by lovely lady and fellow photography finalist Tara Cain.

What do you do on your Sundays? Mine were Silent for a little while...

Or how about a photo meme? The Kreativ Blogger Award got me to dig out 7 interesting photos...

And in this post, I totally ranted on about how my blog is just AWESOME, and cinched the deal with some of the best photography ever.

Noah's second birthday was pretty good fun, and there's pics of cake. Which I made. Not.

And over the last year maybe, I've had some AWESOME FUN with light art, and if I pull my finger out I might even do a tutorial or something on this soon.

And of course, last but definitely not least, who can forget my tweet stalking of Stephen Fry? It's not really photography, but it is, and it's also a good example of how persistent I can be, when I want to be.

And now, for the finest example of my photography work, because that's what this is all about:

OR:

Some Things I Saw This Week

OR:

The Post Where I Leave You All Wondering What The Fuck

It's been an eventful week, Isaac had his birthday yesterday (which I'll blog about, but since he's only one and won't ever remember it, this post is WAY more important), Noah has been seriously trying my patience, I did my first ever adult portrait photo shoot, I started a BlipFoto account (because obviously I'm so lazy and have way too much spare time on my hands) and, um, I appear to have been shortlisted for the MADs Best MAD Blog Photography.

I believe when I found out, my words were:

Which was a direct result of this.

So then I read this:

So!! I thought I would just say, um, THANK YOU SO VERY COCKING MUCH!! I seriously did not see this coming. I actually said to D that there was no way on God's rather wet earth that I'd make it as a finalist. I talk about shit, I post random crap, and Jesus H Mother Cocking Christ, have you SEEN WHO ELSE I'M UP AGAINST??? The pictures these guys take are fucking awesome. I urge you to click on those links and take a look, cos SERIOUSLY. Oh Em Eff Gee.

So I thought, maybe I should write a very gushy post and tell you all thank you SO FUCKING MUCH for helping me get this far. I would love it if you were to vote for me to win (have you seen the prizes? Yes please), although I'm still amazed you've helped me get to being a finalist.

I'm barely a photographer in my eyes; with no training of any sort I've still got so much to learn. But becoming a finalist? Well that's just the biggest complement I could ever have right now.

So maybe I should post some pictures to um, show how I got here maybe? You know, "demonstrate" a bit of my work?

Ah that girl appeals to my nature, she does. And I gotta admit, I love a challenge.

So here are the "rules", if you will.

1. You must thank the person who has given you the award - Thank youuu!! :D
2. Copy the logo and place it on your blog -


3. Link the person who has nominated you for the award - See 1st paragraph!
4. Name 7 things about yourself that people might find interesting. - See (variation) below
5. Nominate 7 other Kreativ Bloggers - Hmmm...See below
6. Post links to the 7 blogs you nominate - Guess what? Yeah, see below
7. Let the nominated victims bloggers know they have been tagged - I guess I do that when I'm done?

Alrighty, 7 interesting photos!! All of these images are straight from camera and unedited...so here goes...

No.1

I took this on the 1st June 2009, nearly a month after Isaac had been born. Me, D and the boys decided to spend the day at the Safari Park and it was a great chance for me to see if I could photograph wildlife! I'd never done it before, and while I got billions of shots, I'd have to say this one of a lion walking across the road right in front of us is my fave...

No.2

I am a HUGE fan of crazy photography using special effects and little to no post processing. I'd seen someone's photos of water splashes and droplets and things, and decided to go for something a little bigger...so I started throwing a lime into a pint glass of water, backlit with a white torch and a green led. I remember cleaning up an awful lot that night...

No.3

I warned you I like the crazy stuff, eh? This was taken down in New Polzeath, Cornwall as part of a music portfolio I was putting together, about 4 years ago. We'd just finished and I was holding my cello stood up in the sand. I went to lift it, but the spike was stuck in...so I let go. And this was the result.

That, plus in forcing myself to try to post every day, has made me start posting for every one else, rather than myself.

I try to please way to many people with this blog, I swear...

Ok, today I'm going to vent about Isaac. Or at least, Isaac and his slow growth thing. Plenty of people have seen how much food he puts away. He currently eats twice as much as Noah, though is not as active (he's obviously not walking yet, just coasting and crawling, plus he has way more down time than Noah). Yet he is pretty much putting on no weight, not gaining any length, but still looks cuter than any other human baby known to, uh, me.

He's dropped from above 99th centile down to 25th, and everyone's all "Oh it's ok! He's just levelling out! He's an active kid! Why can't you just accept the fact you have a dwarf baby?"

(I have nothing against dwarf babies. Honestly. But if he decides he IS gonna be a dwarf baby? I'd at least like to make sure he has permission from a doctor/professional/google to do so.)

He's otherwise healthy (as far as I can tell) and happy...but that good old doubt and maternal instinct likes to quietly chew away at my left ass cheek, meaning I can't just sit around and hope for the best.

Who the hell in their right mind made me a Mother???

Ok, since I'm clearly just writing about a load of shit, I think this is a great time to re-plug the fact that I made it to Position #79 of the tots 100 UK Parent Blogs:

And also, whilst this obviously isn't first place, it's still in the top 100, which totally means you should go vote for me over at the MADs (Mums And Dads? Bloggers? Should it be MAD Bs? Perhaps not, because with a mind like mine, that just makes me think of "Mad Bastards" or something, and seeing as that's much less effective, I'll just let that one go...)

Er -

YEAH!! Go vote for me over at the MADs.

You just know that if you do, I'll totally send you chocolate biscuits and some pictures of beautiful babies. And, um, you can borrow my private jet which is invincible to all volcanic ash.

I'm flattered. So immensely flattered. I don't even know what to say. I submitted way back, not expecting to make it on, at all. I confess I submitted, and actually said something like "Hah! If I make it on there I'll fall over backwards and sideways simultaneously." (Or words to that effect).

And then suddenly, there I am, at number 79. Not even two million and eight, or even 101, but position 79. And 79 is such a magic number too, particularly on this month's index, as it means I won the draw for a ticket, and I'm now able to go to Cybermummy, which is like a UK version of Blogher. Which comes just as D and I had pretty much given up hope on me being able to go.

OMG!!!

All of the above is thanks to a number of people, and they are (in no particular order):

Sally Whittle over at Who's the Mummy?

Cybermummy, funnily enough, over at Cybermummy

Family Holidays, something we could ALL do with

And of course, most of all, Sally's daughter the flippin' lovely Flea, who helped me get to Cybermummy.

I even get to (eventually) add some shiny new badges to my blog!!

YEAHHHH!!!!

Isaac was pretty pleased for me too. :)

There's quite a few of you out there who like me, which I find IMMENSELY flattering! Don't worry, I'm not about to go out and start bopping about how frigging awesome I am, mainly because I know you all know that already.

*snort*

But in this post I shall go over the latest awards I have received. Because apparently, I'm pretty cool.

(do you have any idea how odd it is to just SAY that? Not even out loud, but here in this blog??)

First up, is another Sunshine Award! This one comes from Sam over at Keep Calm & Eat Cake (one of the many awesome blog titles I've seen over the years). I'm not sure if my Ode to Bacon had anything to do with it, but she presents me with the Sunshine Award, as seen here:

This is the third time I've had this award, and in all seriousness I really am thrilled to bits to receive it, especially as I've been a bit of a miserable bugger lately...

So thank you VERY MUCH Sam, I really appreciate it!!

All pretty awesome blogs.

Next award lately comes from the ever entertaining Rosie Scribble. She's very lovely, and hopefully I should be meeting her pretty soon (squeeee!) all being well. The fab award this time is the Kreativ Blogger award, which is pretty frigging cool, but also requires me to disclose 7 things you did not know about me.

Well here is said fab award:

(which is pretty freakin' cool)

Well since I already pretty much put myself out there, I'm going to have to apologise in advance if I repeat myself, but here goes:

1. Because my pelvis is so much better, I often attempt to Riverdance through the kitchen, rather than just walk. But only in the kitchen.

2. I was on Blue Peter and have a Blue Peter badge.

3. I'm crapping myself every time I give out a business card, yet thrilled to bits every time someone accepts one.

4. I have episodes of the Powerpuff Girls on my PC upstairs. And maybe Powerpuff Girls The Movie on DVD.

5. I asked Lynda Bellingham for her autograph whilst I was on tour in Canada.

6. I played cello professionally for 24 years, and have performed in may parts of the world.

7. I survived hurricane Gilbert in Jamaica in 1988; my parents and siblings were at home in the UK and I had travelled out alone to see my grandfather. I was 9 years old.

Omfg. Holy...omg.

So, I post a while back about how I'm struggling to meet demands and needs and everyone was all "Oh hell yeah girl, you are SO not alone, and we WILL support you". And I was all "holy fuck! Um thanks for your support dammit y'all are lovely!"

And then, cos to be honest I thought my blog was pretty shit but didn't particularly care, I wrote about who's to say a blog is good or bad because suddenly there was this crazy uproar about good blogs and bad blogs, and everyone was all "OMFG I'M A SHIT BLOGGER AND NOOOOOO!!!" and others were all "I BLOG AND TOTALLY KICK YOUR ASS MOMMY MO FOOOOOO!!!"

(The whole thing made me laugh to be fair, and I still smirk when I read my own input, but you know.)

And you were all "GOOD FOR YOU. And also? YOUR BLOG ROX. And COCK". And I couldn't love you all enough for that, because I know I blog shit sometimes (a lot of the time) and you were all so fucking lovely about it and made me smile 'n' shit.

And then, on a whim (after speaking to a BLOODY LOVELY friend who is so damn nice I want to dislike her but she's too flippin lovely, DAMMIT), I posted about how we beat ourselves up for the most innocent of things, and as parents (moms AND dads) we are particularly hard on ourselves, and suddenly I have people I have never ever known in anyway, coming to me to leave support. Not just for me, I hasten to add, no no. Not at all. To leave support for EVERYONE who has gone through the same.

And if I'm honest, I'm totally fucking overwhelmed. People sent me messages about how they've done the same, how they found me, how the post moved them and touched them, they've reposted it, they've ReTweeted it...and I've never known anything like it.

Ironically, I felt bad that I stopped replying in comments because I got so overwhelmed with the responses. And oddly enough, I suddenly wondered if I was going to be under a lot of pressure to write more profoundly amazing posts.

I won't promise to do it, because like I said in a previous post, I don't write specifically for others, I write what comes to me naturally. So if you get another amazing post, then um, it'll be a miracle!

But something made me seriously want to address the posts I've written and it was in reaction to you amazing people. I've received an award from MommaRuthSays in the past, and then suddenly I had another 2 awards in the short space of time. I confess I uhm'd and ah'd about responding; truth be told? I honestly didn't think I deserved them, mainly because I was too busy reeling from the shock of everything else. But obviously, I have to get over myself.

And so, my many, MANY thanks go to Bare Naked Mummy for awarding me the Sunshine Award because I'm a little bit of sunshine to make us feel better (oh hell yeah!!) and Rosie Scribble, who has also given me the Sunshine Award and is SOOOO lovely. I gotta say, I'm pretty fucking pleased about this, the timing could not have been ANY BETTER.

I hate not being able to thank everyone individually, but I swear there have been SO MANY messages, by the time I respond, blogging will be extinct. So I feel a bit pathetic with this offering, but, well, thank you.

Thank you. So much.

Here's the instructions:

1. Thank the person who gave you the award
2. Paste the award on your blog
3. Link the person who nominated you for the award
4. Tell 7 interesting things about yourself
5. Nominate 7 bloggers or less
6. Post links to the 7 blogs you nominated.

So now apparently, I'm supposed to list 7 interesting things about myself. This could be quite a challenge. What I CAN do, is list 7 pointless things about me that you may or may not have known. So erm, yeah.

1) When I was 9 years old I spent 3 months in Jamaica with my Grandfather, and without any other family. I was only meant to be there for 4 weeks, but Hurricane Gilbert arrived and I had to stay out there until it passed.

2) I've given birth to 22lb of baby in less than two years. And yes, I only have 2 children.

3) I do not, have never and probably never will consider myself to be a "Yummy Mummy".

4) I would like to consider myself to be a MILF. Yeah, I said it. And yeah, there's a difference.

5) I have a very, VERY soft spot for James Spader. Especially in Boston Legal. Mmmmmmmmmm.

6) I would like my bra size to be 36H again. I miss those. E cups will do for now.

7) I regularly feel intimidated by an awful lot of people in the Blogosphere and on Twitter. I'm not entirely sure why.

Next I have to nominate 7 bloggers or less. I can't possibly choose just 7. So I'll choose 6 instead.