Showing posts with label Blogging. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Blogging. Show all posts
Dear...
@cosmicgirlie
Lovely Lady TC

I know this note is gonna seem really weird, but I just wanted to say thank you. Your gallery idea is so bloody brilliant, and I love how even when I submit a crappy gallery pic, I've still had to think very carefully about what to post. And even if the pic sucks, I still try to make it worthwhile with my choice of words.

My last post, "Oh. Hello Stranger." has pressed so many of my buttons. It's so funny because, when I first started out on this particular Gallery theme, it WAS going to be a silly one. I've got 4 of the photos ready to go, and know what I want to do for the others.

Actually, I KNEW what I WANTED to do. But not anymore, because once again, you've made me think in a completely different way. There are mahoosive stories behind this post, which I come ever close to sharing with more and more people; had it not been for your Gallery, this teeny tiny snippet of history wouldn't have become such a public part of my blog. I know I don't give away too much; it's still incredibly raw. But I'm close; I'm so close. And that's pretty good, I think, for me.

But anyway. I just want to say thanks. So much. For helping me find an outlet in a way so natural to me. For helping me push my boundaries and make me think. For such an awesome idea. For being so inspiring for so many people.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Everyone Who Commented Previously

I don't know what to say. Apart from, obviously, thank you. My blog is changing; I didn't mean for it to happen, but it's reassuring and yet quite frightening. I'm changing as a person, it's out of my control, and I need to make sure I can BE the person I'm turning into.

Some of you know how big a change it is. Others are completely unaware. And that's ok. There's a lot to learn about me, so much more, and in nearly three years of blogging, amazingly, I don't think I've given away much of the stuff I think is huge.

But that's ok. It's coming. Soon. I'll change. Things will change. And that's ok.

So thank you, for helping me. I hope I can help you too, because quite a few of you have said you want to get your musical instruments out to play again. But you say you're intimidated. Or scared. Or nervous. Or wary. You know what? I was all those and more. So much more. But if I can do it? ANYONE can do it. And even better? We'll be here to support you. In fact, I'd love you to get in touch if you decide to play again. Even if you don't get it out. Even if you're just thinking about it.

We can support each other. I know it.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

People Who Are Keen to Hear Me Play

I am a LOOOONG way from that just yet. Or at least, I think I am. It won't be this week. Or maybe next week. I doubt the week after. But I might catch myself off guard...and it might even be tomorrow. Or next year. I don't know. I may be proud of how far I got, but I'll never be proud enough to brag of my "skills" or "talent" or whatever.

Sure I have concerts coming up. I can say that now. I'm coming to terms with that now. You're welcome to come here me play, but I'll be safely buried away in the security blanket of an orchestra.

I like it that way. For now.

Maybe one day I'll vlog me playing.

Maybe.

One day.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

JG and CB

I'm glad you're proud of me. I really am. Whether it's the cello or the camera, it doesn't matter. I'm like a kid who wants to be patted on the head and rewarded with a tiny "well done". Because no one else did it before, when I was going through the heartache. So when my best friends say things like that?

It means more than anything.

I love you.

jay xxx
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Too Overwhelmed to Think of a Title
@cosmicgirlie
I don't even remember how it happened. Making awesome connections with new people. Maybe it started with the blogging? Like, way back in the early days, when I started this on my own, just documenting my pregnancy with Noah. Maybe it was twitter? Where I suddenly made even more new friends?

Everything took a fantastically awesome turn this week. In fact, things have been turning for a while, what with meeting up with porridgebrain and BumblingTweets in the last two weeks...that was pretty awesome and very much blew me away. Why have I not met these lovely people before? Where have they been all this time?

I was trundling along, thinking this was all very lovely, and how nice it was that I'd met a couple of lovely people. And then this week, something happened that I never, ever thought would happen.

I met up with a group of other ladies and their kiddos, whom I had never seen before in my life, took Isaac with me, and had a bloody fantastic time. To the point where I got home, and have been in a weird kind of happy trance ever since.

As per my previous post, I was right in that I was stupidly nervous. I'd picked up porridgebrain from the station, and was eternally glad to have her with me meeting everyone else for the first time, but still, I was pretty much crapping it.

They're all so...so...confident? Amazing? Popular? They seem so organized, on the ball, grown-up. Their kids are gorgeous, incredibly well behaved and they all bonded with each other pretty much immediately. I realised when I got home, they are ALL like the sort of girls you want to join up with in high school; you know, that group of girls that are somehow amazingly popular and have all the cool stuff and are really nice without even trying. And you kind of feel like the one who is a fool every time you open your mouth. Or look up. Or, uh, breathe.

I was gutted I wasn't able to get any photos; I had Isaac in the Baby Bjorn and he was getting quite irate (starving, it seemed, and I suspect those bastard teeth are driving him nuts), as per usual I'd opted to carry a pointless mountain of stuff and I'd forgotten to bring the small camera bag. *sigh* There are some great pics on their sites though!! (Omg, intimidated by their photography skills much?!?!?)

I won't go on about it all, but I'll say that I had a fucking awesome time with cake, bacon, corned beef sandwiches and damn cool little people.

Oh, and of course, Bumbling Tweets, Jo Beaufoix, Muddy No Sugar, porridgebrain, Rosie Scribble, and of course Tara Cain. Who IS gorgeous and amazing. They ALL are!

Hope we do it again soon...
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I Has a Nom
@cosmicgirlie
Well actually, I has a nominayshun, but that wouldn't have made much sense.

It turns out someone out there likes my blog, and has nominated me for The MADS 2010 Blog Award!

To say I'm chuffed to bits is an understatement. I'm like, over the fucking moon! Bewildered, also, but THRILLED.

In fact, when I was told about it, it took me some time to believe whether it was true, and was convinced someone was yanking my chain. But no! Seriously! You guys, um, actually like me and stuff!!!

I appreciate there are some of you reading this and wondering what the fuck I'm talking about, and if that's the case then you should head on over to Who's The Mummy blog and go look at all the awesome blogs over there that have been nominated. There are plenty I read, some of them in my blog roll, and they're all worth a look in. Then when you find one/some you like, GO VOTE for them!

Then they can win pretty prizes and stuff.

The only thing I'll say is, just be wary of who you nominate and what category you're throwing them into. You can't nominate someone for a category they don't really belong to. For example, if there was Most Intelligent MAD Blog, it would be a little silly to nominate me for that because let's face it, I'm pretty much Queen of Sheer Stupidty.

However, I've been nominated for Best Looking Mad Blog. Why thank you!! I am pretty good looking. I'm thinking about plastering my face over my blog some more, to generate more interest. Or perhaps another pic of my arse, or maybe my boobs? I think that would spruce it up nicely.

Wait...of course that doesn't really reflect how good my blog looks, but it's all content, right?

So thank you! In all fairness, I had uhm'd and ah'd for AGES about this particular design and I'm still unsure but it's nice to think someone else likes it. So I certainly appreciate that nomination.

I've also been nominated for Best Mad Baby Blogger.

Now there's something you need to understand here. The two fucking gorgeous babies you see on this site? They're not really mine. I stole them. From a supermodel. She makes gorgeous babies, and I have these two on loan as and when I need them. Their real names are Jedward and Peter Andre III. They attend Cambridge University in their spare time. One of them shaves cats for a living.

But nonetheless I thank you for the nomination, because I'm obviously doing a good job at pretending to raise them as my own.

I'm immensely thrilled to bits to have been nominated for Best MAD Blog Photography, especially as when more often than not, I haven't a fucking clue what I'm doing with a camera. I pick it up, twiddle some knobs, press some buttons and the screen on the back changes and looks vaguely like what's in front of me. Then I open up this thing called "Photoshop" and edit the bejesus out of them to make them look vaguely presentable, then I decide they still look shit so I pimp them round the interwebs a bit, and eventually when they return to me, they look pretty good.

But I totally take all the credit, you know, because they're on my blog. So obviously, that's um, all cool. Awesome. And actually came as a fab compliment to me after finally getting my photog website live, even after an very large and annoying hiccup with my gallery (but that's another story).

So thank you so VERY much for nominating me! The MADS is a wicked idea; great way for people to show off their stuff, awesome way to find brilliant new blogs in categories that would appeal to you. They've clearly worked their arses off to get it going, and just by nominating shows appreciation for what they've achieved so far.

Of course, you should now go and tell all your friends to go nominate some blogs too; there's shit loads to choose from and seriously, they're bloody amazing. Click the pretty MADS button on the right hand side to go to the website, or click on of the billions of links I've sprinkled around this blog. You're welcome to get your friends to nominate me too, or you could take them to McDonalds and teach them about dipping fries into banana milkshake.

Do not knock it til you've tried it. Seriously.
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Actually...A Bit of Sunshine
@cosmicgirlie
Omg. Like, seriously.

Omfg. Holy...omg.

So, I post a while back about how I'm struggling to meet demands and needs and everyone was all "Oh hell yeah girl, you are SO not alone, and we WILL support you". And I was all "holy fuck! Um thanks for your support dammit y'all are lovely!"

And then, cos to be honest I thought my blog was pretty shit but didn't particularly care, I wrote about who's to say a blog is good or bad because suddenly there was this crazy uproar about good blogs and bad blogs, and everyone was all "OMFG I'M A SHIT BLOGGER AND NOOOOOO!!!" and others were all "I BLOG AND TOTALLY KICK YOUR ASS MOMMY MO FOOOOOO!!!"

(The whole thing made me laugh to be fair, and I still smirk when I read my own input, but you know.)

And you were all "GOOD FOR YOU. And also? YOUR BLOG ROX. And COCK". And I couldn't love you all enough for that, because I know I blog shit sometimes (a lot of the time) and you were all so fucking lovely about it and made me smile 'n' shit.

And then, on a whim (after speaking to a BLOODY LOVELY friend who is so damn nice I want to dislike her but she's too flippin lovely, DAMMIT), I posted about how we beat ourselves up for the most innocent of things, and as parents (moms AND dads) we are particularly hard on ourselves, and suddenly I have people I have never ever known in anyway, coming to me to leave support. Not just for me, I hasten to add, no no. Not at all. To leave support for EVERYONE who has gone through the same.

And if I'm honest, I'm totally fucking overwhelmed. People sent me messages about how they've done the same, how they found me, how the post moved them and touched them, they've reposted it, they've ReTweeted it...and I've never known anything like it.

Ironically, I felt bad that I stopped replying in comments because I got so overwhelmed with the responses. And oddly enough, I suddenly wondered if I was going to be under a lot of pressure to write more profoundly amazing posts.

I won't promise to do it, because like I said in a previous post, I don't write specifically for others, I write what comes to me naturally. So if you get another amazing post, then um, it'll be a miracle!

But something made me seriously want to address the posts I've written and it was in reaction to you amazing people. I've received an award from MommaRuthSays in the past, and then suddenly I had another 2 awards in the short space of time. I confess I uhm'd and ah'd about responding; truth be told? I honestly didn't think I deserved them, mainly because I was too busy reeling from the shock of everything else. But obviously, I have to get over myself.

And so, my many, MANY thanks go to Bare Naked Mummy for awarding me the Sunshine Award because I'm a little bit of sunshine to make us feel better (oh hell yeah!!) and Rosie Scribble, who has also given me the Sunshine Award and is SOOOO lovely. I gotta say, I'm pretty fucking pleased about this, the timing could not have been ANY BETTER.



I hate not being able to thank everyone individually, but I swear there have been SO MANY messages, by the time I respond, blogging will be extinct. So I feel a bit pathetic with this offering, but, well, thank you.

Thank you. So much.
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I'm a Good Blogger and this post is SHIT because I SAID SO.
@cosmicgirlie
Today, it all kicked off in the Blogosphere. Apparently, to have a good blog, we're supposed to write what we like, but make sure it complies with what people like; we're meant to be ourselves, but aspire to be someone else; we should be interesting, but real; we should include lots of links to others, but write about ourselves.

And if you want to be a "Top Blogger", you have to do all of the above and much, MUCH more.

Which is why, this post will be utterly shit, because I? Will not conform to any Rules of Blogging. Which makes me a good blogger. Nyer.

What I WILL do, is blog the following.

Today, my arse appeared in #assmail on Boob Emancipation. Given that I have now discovered I can take a pic of my own arse in the shower, I am proud as FUCK.

I have a fixation for boobs. I am not lesbian. But I DO think boobs should be celebrated. As should many asses.

Today, Noah barfed up his breakfast at the table, then started listening to said table. Like, head down, ear pressed, smiling at the table. And dancing slightly.

Whilst Noah was doing the above, Isaac was laughing hysterically at his thumb, whilst eating his breakfast.

Shortly after, Noah ralphed all down his front and on the floor. Whilst cleaning this up, Isaac crawled over and puked on my feet. Whilst cleaning all this up, he went to go bang his head on the corner of the table.

I often do not care what people think. About my blog, or me, or whatever. Sometimes I'm sorry, but often I'm not. And that's how my shit rolls.

I love comments. Good and bad. However I do not live or blog for comments. But I ALWAYS appreciate comments. I will not fall apart if there are no comments. But I might consider kicking some ass. I might not always RESPOND to comments, because of course, I am shit, but still. Always nice to have them, even if they make you look like a fucktard. Because I can look back and say "Oh, hi Fucktard!" Or I can look back and say "Cock. You're all being nice and I dunno what to say. Um, thanks."

I love smut. Throw in a cock, and I'm happy.

I managed to make someone feel quite shit today. It wasn't intentional by any means, but frustration (and fear?) got the better of me. And so, as you all know what I'm like, I started to tell it like it is. I don't think he hates me (much), but you may now call me one of the biggest bitches out there. And I suspect he may avoid me for a little while. Unfortunately, I do not know how to be straightforward without being an absolute prunt*. But I suspect I won't change. At least I didn't go all the way and let it all out. Yeah, cos that makes it better.

I regularly like to exclaim "cock" on twitter. It makes me feel better, and smile. It makes me feel even better when people say/shout "cock" at me. That makes my day.

In keeping with February YOR, today I managed to complete Day 6 of the 30 Day Shred. I can get to circuit 3 without screaming, I no longer crawl up the stairs, a pair of my trousers are a teeny bit loose, my boobs are shrinking but so is my belly, and hotness will soon be mine.

January YOR is well under way, and holy fuck, it might even be live by the end of this month. The number of photographers on twitter is making me SHIT myself. Which reminds me, one of my fave photographers who is also a good friend, was featured in Photo Pro Magazine this month. And by featured, I mean OMFG 5 PAGE SPREAD WTF AWESOMENESS. Added bonus? Well. You had all better recognise that baby and squooshy mouth, or I shall hunt you down and yell at you a lot.

That is all.

And now? Please to look at pictures, in the hope of making distracting you from my crap blog with AHWW!!!! LOOK AT TEH CUUUUUUTE!






Yes I know. You totally forgot what you were going to say, right?

Allow me to distract you some more.


IN. DEED.




This is how we roll.


* Thanks to Karl Erikson for use of the word "prunt". Tis awesome.
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Award Winning
@cosmicgirlie
Thank you very very very much indeed to Momma Ruth over at mommaruthsays who's nominated me for my FIRST EVER AWARD!!!! Which...must mean I'm doing something right...



Here's the instructions:

1. Thank the person who gave you the award
2. Paste the award on your blog
3. Link the person who nominated you for the award
4. Tell 7 interesting things about yourself
5. Nominate 7 bloggers or less
6. Post links to the 7 blogs you nominated.

So now apparently, I'm supposed to list 7 interesting things about myself. This could be quite a challenge. What I CAN do, is list 7 pointless things about me that you may or may not have known. So erm, yeah.

1) When I was 9 years old I spent 3 months in Jamaica with my Grandfather, and without any other family. I was only meant to be there for 4 weeks, but Hurricane Gilbert arrived and I had to stay out there until it passed.

2) I've given birth to 22lb of baby in less than two years. And yes, I only have 2 children.

3) I do not, have never and probably never will consider myself to be a "Yummy Mummy".

4) I would like to consider myself to be a MILF. Yeah, I said it. And yeah, there's a difference.

5) I have a very, VERY soft spot for James Spader. Especially in Boston Legal. Mmmmmmmmmm.

6) I would like my bra size to be 36H again. I miss those. E cups will do for now.

7) I regularly feel intimidated by an awful lot of people in the Blogosphere and on Twitter. I'm not entirely sure why.

Next I have to nominate 7 bloggers or less. I can't possibly choose just 7. So I'll choose 6 instead.


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Observation
@cosmicgirlie
One of the things I've noticed about blogging (and even on twitter) is how obsessed people can become regarding how many followers they have, how many comments they get, and how much traffic they're generating. I'm also intrigued by those who don't have much of the above, but can't seem to figure out why.

In terms of twitter, you'll get more feedback and conversation going pending on the number of followers you have; more followers subjects you to the public a little more, and of course, the more you interact with them, the more interesting an experience it becomes.

Supposedly. For some.

In terms of blogging, I understand that the ideal is to blog regularly, whatever "regularly" might be (several times a day? Several times a week? Once every month at exactly the same time?). It also helps to make yourself accessible; having an easy to read blog and being able to comment freely should you choose to do so.

Lately I've raised the question of profiling (in a fashion) through a blog. What does it take to raise blogging stats? What does it take to get hundreds of comments? How do you appeal to the public? How do you get the public to respond and/or relate to you?

When I asked the question on twitter, the feedback was interesting, and I could see what they were saying just by looking at my own statistics on my blog. Some people lurk and choose not to comment. Some people comment when they only want to bitch about something. Some comment all the time because they don't have any where else to say what they want to say. And then some comment often because they just genuinely have something to feedback on, or whatever. There are obviously more, but these seem to be the general categories.

I'm thrilled that the visitor figures for my blog have risen lately, however I've noticed the drastic increase in spam and anonymous comments as well; you may have noticed lately that your comments take a while to appear. After having received several racist and extremely inappropriate spam comments, I had to lock things up a wee bit. Disappointing, yes, but expected at some point.

Interestingly, many have said that blogger was not particularly friendly to commenters; there are so many formats out there; for me, Blogger just seemed to be the best place to start, way back when. But for a while I've been toying with the idea of Wordpress, or some other format. Not just because I would like more people to comment on my blog (which would be nice, you know, let me know ya'll are out there), but also because I'd like this to be as approachable as possible to all readers. I feel a bit...like...this is for everyone, you know?

At the end of the day? Would like to hear your feedback.

Just sayin'.
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Ode To Twitter
@cosmicgirlie
I love twitter. I truly do. If I could marry it, or sleep with it, or cuddle it occasionally, I would.

As a result of twitter, in this last week I have spoken to Andi Peters, Philip Schofield, Jonathan Ross, Alyssa Milano, Robert Llewellyn, Rob Brydon, Gia Milinovich and Krisnan Guru-Murthy. And in doing so, I've raised £800. I have £200 to go (two more celebrities to make £1000, as sponsored by @makesmilk).

And of course, who can forget that Twitter is responsible for my epic stalking of Stephen Fry. Quite possibly one of the best 10 hour stints of my life.

Also thanks to twitter, I'm now into my 32nd hour without having gone to bed for proper sleep. I've accumulated about 3 hours sleep in this time frame, and I feel like shit great! Added to that the Universal Case of F.O.F going round myself, Noah and Isaac, makes for a very happy household indeed. Not. But anyway.

Twitter is also responsible for some very awesome friendships with people I probably would never have met otherwise. If I haven't listed you, it's because I'm too lazy to post more links into text. Sorry. But you know who you are, and there are so many of you. And I'm in love with each and every one of you.

However there were plenty more people on twitter who helped me find my beans. And rejoiced with me when I found my beans.

There are also things which might and/or will happen, because of Twitter. Lovely things. Great things. Pretty cool things.

Like Blogher10 (OOOOOMFG) next August. I watched everyone tweet their way through it this year and it looked like one of the most awesome gatherings EVAH. Right down to the after parties, all through conferences, and, uh, Sparklecorn. There are people I CANNOT WAIT to meet at Blogher 10, and I'm wondering if there are ways to meet up with people who can't get there.

Also cool, is recent sort-of almost maybe-it-will-happen conversations with Karl Erikson, and his hilarious talk show, Secondhand Radio (I have no idea why it's called Secondhand Radio. I must ask him sometime).

I know some of you hate it. Some of you are Facebook whores. Some of you even go to the dark side and worship MySpace. But that's ok.

Twitter has shown me some good times. I heart you, twitter.
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Does This Colour Suit me?
@cosmicgirlie
I've been doing a lot of reading around lately, and what I'm enjoying the most is reading other people's blogs. There are so many to choose from, many of which are listed in my blogroll (see left). However, one such person who has caught my eye lately, for numerous reasons, is MochaMomma, and especially, this post.

Oddly enough, it struck a chord with me for very bizarre and perhaps selfish reasons. And yet somehow, just the first few paragraphs seemed to reflect a great deal of my life.

One of the first things I remember growing up, where I began to realise the colour of my skin was some sort of "issue", was when I started to play the cello. Even though I was only 6 years old, it was noted that there were kids wanting to learn who, well, weren't white. Other "coloured"* kids dropped out over time.

The skin colour hit home more when in various youth orchestras, concert audience members would ask me "what it was like to be a black person in an orchestra, to be the only black one playing?" And even better was to spot random black people in the audience and ask me "if they were my family?"

It came to a head when throughout high school, I was bullied for nearly 4 years, for not being a "proper" black person. To this day, I can only assume it was because I didn't play proper black music but chose the cello instead, didn't wear trousers that hung off of my ass, have heavy gold jewelry hanging off every body part and be able to "bogle" (yes, they asked me, and my white friends, if we could "bogle". And laughed at us when we said no).

I thank the gods that since high school, I've been able to laugh off questions about my colour and how I manage to "cope" in society; but I'm saddened too because I've had to resort to blaming it on ignorance. I wanna say it's ok, I can deal...but we shouldn't be ignorant to it, you know?

MochaMomma addresses education and educators and race, and I myself still have to question the attitudes of colour within education. Many people will say that most black people have a chip on their shoulder, and that's why it's all such a taboo issue. My children are mixed race, or half caste if you will, and it's more than likely they'll be labelled. People will have to get to know them before coming to a fair judgement. Supposedly. But it's ok, Jay, because you're different, you're not really a black person, you're not like the rest of them.

Guys? I'm still black. No seriously! Look closely! It's not a tan, or boot polish, I swear.

I'm not even sure where I'm going with this post, but for some reason, the post I read really struck a chord with me. I barely understand the post (because my nose is stuffy, my head is swimming with exhaustion and I should have been in bed three hours ago). But it still struck me. Go and have a read. And be more educated about colour.

If she goes to Blogher10, and is doing a panel, you can pretty much bet your ass I'm gonna be there.*** Because she's black? No. Because she's "addressing issues appropriate to me to which I can relate"? Actually, no.

It's mainly because she's a pretty inspiring lady.


*In quote marks because being called coloured bothers me...I'm not some kind of black outline that's been coloured** in.

**And incidentally, white folk are blue when they're down, red when hot, purple when cold, grey when dead, green when ill and brown when they want to be tanned - who's the coloured one now??!!

***HELL YEAH I'm planning on going to BlogHer10!!!
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