...and a big stinky sore nipple comes along and bites you on the butt. Or, it comes along and you think to yourself "OH MY GOD I WOULD SOONER BY IN LABOUR AGAIN THAN DO THIS PAIN GAHHHHHHHHH".
Somehow, when I wasn't paying attention/forgot the Lansinoh/was being lazy, Left Boob went and decided to do that uncomfortable shredded thing where it looks like Freddy Kreuger decided to find the most unorthodox way into your bra. Sadly it means I'm reminded of how I dealt with Noah in his first 6 weeks
Today Isaac had the joy of trying out a nipple condom, which proved to be freaking horrendous. Yeah, when he keeps latching on because he can't get a good "grip" (seriously), it kind of causes a bit more trauma. And because I am the Queen of All That Is Chicken-Shit, Right Boob is quite colossal because I've been feeding Isaac mostly on that one. Feed more milk to get more milk, right? Yes yes, I know I should feed him normally on both, yaddah yaddah, but I'd like to see you take a Stanley knife and some lemon juice/vinegar/salt to yer nipple and keep smiling.*
So here I sit, boob hanging out, smothered in breast milk and Lansinoh, hoping that I don't find the nipple at the foot of the bed in the morning. Lovely.
*I'd rather you didn't, because if it really IS anything like what I'm dealing with, then it sure as hell ain't fun.