I was determined not to do a miserable post. I'm trying so hard to enjoy Christmas week. Then the days started slipping by, and Christmas day was fast approaching, and I knew I hadn't blogged, and wanted to blog something happy.

Boxing Day - DONE! Everyone present and accounted for.

I planned to do nothing today. I refused to cook. Mr Forman did bacon butties for me and D. I refused to run around after people. M+FIL cooked dinner of goose and a million different veg. In fact, for the day, my biggest effort came in opening the rest of the presents from the family (I can't believe we opened presents for three days in a row) and making sure Noah didn't destroy his cousin's Wii (hey, well, ya know, if you will get it out in front of him...)

It was a great day! Noah sat in a booster chair at the table throughout the whole meal and ate -uh, well, he just ate. And ate. And then I believe he ate some more. He started off with his crackers, then he had a portion of my parsnip soup, then some carrots, parsnip, tasted a sprout, 3 digestive biscuits, 2 smoothie pouches, chunks of apple, a fruit stick, mouthfuls of ice cream and his first taste of chocolate and alsoa chocolate biscuit!! Funnily enough, he licked all the chocolate off the biscuit.

All that was just for lunch. He managed to outlast both his older cousins at the table; it was a sight to behold. I think he was sat at the table, or at least non-stop eating from about 1:30 - 3pm. What I couldn't understand was how he was still able to eat his tea (slice of toast, crispy puffs, fruit stick and a jelly) that same evening, only 2 hours later. He found it amusing that he spent the evening passing gas and smirked every time he let go of a good one...man I love that kid!

We've all had some great gifts (which, if any readers sent any, I thank you very much indeed), all eaten tons of food (and still eating some - ham, egg and chips for tea today, freezer now full of pea and ham soup, duck still in fridge), watched some utterly crap tv and spent far too much time in front of a very large computer screen (yeah, uh, did I mention my iMac? Yeah got one for xmas ya know...).

Noah still exercises his tantrums, we've all been feeling quite shit with Cold & Flu v7.4, I'm fast approaching the Land of No Sleep and the house reeeeeeeeeeally needs a tidy up...but it's been a great couple of days.

I even spoke to Mr L yesterday to thank him for our gifts (car and football for Noah, bottle of rum for D, duvet for me. I'm sure I caught the short-ish straw, but hey it'll be good for when I finally give up the bed and go to the sofa). He was really pleased to hear from me which was nice, even if it did feel a little odd after so many years. I've promised I'd take Noah and D round to see him on Sunday, especially as we all seem to be making an effort. I feel strangely pleased with myself!

Noah's first Christmas, me and D's first Christmas as parents, first fully multiple family Christmas - DONE.

Due Date: 04/21/2009
Week: 23+1 day
Month: 6
Trimester: 2
Fetus Age: 21 weeks
Heartbeat: 149 bpm
Time to Go: 119 days
Size: The Christmas Ham?

Christmas Eve - DONE. Christmas day and Boxing day to go.

Feeling very smug with myself after today. I reflected upon my Christmas Menu for today, and quietly shat my pants (which is actually a possibility now, thanks fibresure!) at extravagance of the menu, and the ham which was roughly the same size as Noah (can't decide between Noah 'then', or Noah 'now').

However, after realising that the ham was really not going to fit into the largest pot I own, even after trying to boil it for an hour, I gave up and cosied it in foil then shoved it in the oven. For 6 hours. To this very minute, I still don't know how much it weighed, and I didn't take any pictures of it, possibly because I was scared it would object.

But what matters, on this very special Christmas eve, is that I'm now down to half a ham, and should hopefully only be eating it until next summer, all being well. *

My mum came round and got drunk on Baileys; just awesome. She doesn't get loud and in your face, she doesn't get violent, she doesn't even just quietly go to sleep in a corner...no...she just gets...kinda stupid. She has this awesome ability to spout utter crap, it's just awesome. It's often worth getting her drunk just to sit back and watch.

Noah, though having his moments (hey, he's ill! And he's a kid. He's allowed), has been great today. He was beside himself with excitement after opening three of his presents already (for Nana's benefit of course); a whizzing whirring car from his Granddad (my side), a big bouncy ball from Mama and Dada and a musical foot steps piano (think of the film 'Big') from Nana. He could barely contain himself!

Plus he had a whole serving of my soup which he loved (and I know he did because he told me) and then devoured a load of peas and some ham for his tea. We've been having some major food hassles lately so it was a monster sigh of relief to see him eat with comparatively minimal fuss (and some crazy new expressions).

Didn't get to do the pears, D had to drive Mum home (and those are some seriously alcoholic pears...) so they're on hold...but I don't care. Even if tomorrow sucks, today has still been great. Bring on the next two days!

*All ham recipes/ideas/suggestions welcomed and appreciated. There's only so much pea and ham soup a person can eat I think...

Week: 39+2 days
Month: 10 (Jesus Christ on a parmesan and poppy seed cracker)
Trimester: 3
Fetus Age: 37 weeks (it'll be ready for college when it comes out)
Fetal Heartbeat: Still there thank the lord
Size: Much too long
Time to go: 5 days (HAH! Not even due date yet)
Full Term: 16 days ago
Days til New Year: 3 days (urhm...)

Haha yeh I'm still pregnant.

Still spotting, still power walking round Sainsburys, still cramping etc etc...in fact, just so I remember, pre-labour seems to consist of many of the following:

~ Spotting
~ Cramping
~ Nausea
~ Dizziness
~ Crazy Braxton Hicks
~ Back ache
~ Nesting
~ Desperation
~ The need to kill someone/something
~ more that I just can't remember right now

The end of pregnancy is something that no woman should have to go through. In fact, we should be put to sleep until it's born, and this should happen at around 36 weeks, just before that moment when you realise that it's no longer fun, but in fact your crotch is permanently on fire, you're desperate for alcohol and that heartburn DOES in fact plague you day and night.

And people. People people people. What is with this 'are you a mum yet?' 'Have you had it yet?' 'Are you still pregnant?'

Well yes I've had it, I just forgot about it, you know? Did I forget to mention that I pushed a frigging melon the same weight as a bowling ball out of my Mary Jane? Did I not tell you that this belly I have is in fact just excess fat left over from Xmas Dinner?* You dumb asses, YES I'm still preggo and I will TELL YOU when I've had the goddamn baby so STOP HARASSING ME. Cos you know, enough pressure already.

My latest trick? (Cos there's always at least one...) I drink something, and then burp it straight back up. It doesn't even taste acidic because it didn't even get that far. I get to drink everything twice.

Awesome.

*Ham and parmesan salad to start, whole salmon stuffed with spinach, spring onions and mozarella for mains and xmas pud for desert. Ohhhhhhhh yehhhhhhhh.