Due Date: 04/21/2009
Week: 29+2 days
Month: 7
Trimester: 3
Fetus Age: 27 weeks
Time to Go: 74 days
Size: TBC, but my guess is, roughly baby-sized

Alright, alright, so we have success with second time around. I found some very useful tips.

1) Ask for it to be as COLD AS POSSIBLE. Warm phlegm = HELL to the NO.

2) DO NOT chug. Even when the nurses/phlebotomists are sitting there going "Chug! Chug! Chug!". I implore you. DO NOT CHUG.

3) You are advised to SIP in VERY SMALL mouthfuls. This way you will not feel obliged to begin retching and then to spit out (or swallow it back down, if you're feeling that determined) when you have a mouth full of (Lucozade flavoured) phlegm.

4) Pray and hope for the best.

It took me 20 minutes to down the cupful (which I'm SURE was more full than the other day...measured amount my ass...) but it went down, and stayed there.

What they DIDN'T tell me was that I would then have to sit STILL for 2 hours, and couldn't go to my physio appointment, booked from last week. They looked at me like I'd lost the plot when I announced I'd be back soon.

I nearly did lose the plot and felt like clocking them with my crutches (yes, yes, the crutches are back...), and now won't get an appointment for a week or so. I am therefore resorting to walking around, actually hoiking my bump off my pelveis with my hands. It's fun to watch, even more fun to do, and I'm sure just down right hilarious to every one else.

They said they would call me if there were any problems, i.e. the test coming back positive, or if there were any other major concerns. It's now been 24 hours and I haven't heard from them, so you know, hopes up and everyting, it's all good.

I had fun sitting there for nearly three hours (because they forgot to tell me that they don't call you back, you have to go back to the room) and loved the vindictive nurse who jabbed me so hard with the 2nd needle, my arm was stinging for 4 hours afterwards. But it's ok, I have a sense of humour!! See??? HAHHH!AAAHHAAAA!!!!

I haven't pooped in nearly 4 days. *tsk*

Due Date: 04/21/2009
Week: 29+0 days
Month: 7
Trimester: 3
Fetus Age: 27 weeks
Time to Go: 76 days
Size: Average, with built in swimming pool

You see, GTT is actually a form of torture. GTT actually does not stand for Glucose Tolerance Test.

It stands for:

Get The pregnant lady to spew up anything we give her and make her retch for a good half hour after the Torture.

So no, we weren't successful this morning. I got about three quarters of the way through the drink, retching all the way, and finally threw some back up. Lovely. Which meant the test was immediately over. AFTER they had already jabbed me with the needle and taken blood and the rest.

If you've never had a GTT, you're required to fast for 14 hours beforehand (which is just as well I failed because I may have eaten 11½ hours earlier...). So pregnant lady, empty stomach. Let's just remember that.

They then take your blood, which I have no problem with. Needles do not phase me. What DID phase me, was the cup of warm, tropical flavoured Lucozade, which had the consistency of phlegm. THAT did not go down so well. I took a sip at first and immediately felt my stomach churn. I knew this would not go well.

So I took a humongous swig in the hope that I could just get it down faster. I started heaving and brought a tiny bit back up. Which, stupidly, I swallowed again straight away. Psyched up for the home stretch I took another large swig and DING DING DING!! JACKPOT!! Up it came.

Test over. So I go back in the morning to do it again! I can't wait.

However, the good news that came out of this morning was that the (LOVELY AWESOME FAB) midwives at the hospital don't think there's cause for concern with the whole polyhydramnios thing; they reckon my levels are in the normal range. They're speaking to the consultants to see if I need referral, but it's unlikely. And they're still convinced I'll get my home birth. BUT I do need to do the GTT again because of the potential link between the two.

I'm trying to understand most of this, and follow the lingo and jargon, and surprisingly, I'm still not worried at this stage. I'm not sure why, I don't know if I should be worried, but no, still not phased.

I would, however, like to tell you all about the fact that my son and I share EVERYTHING. Today whilst he was sat on my lap for a cuddle watching tv, my own case of excess F.O.F. caught me off guard. I dripped watery snot directly into his hair. Of course I wiped it out immediately. He didn't even notice.

See how loving, caring and sharing we are in our house?